This concept of observing, then learning and then you play, is loosely related to being dropped at the deep end to see if you sink or swim. It’s something I have been battling lately in my belly dance class. I sensed that I felt unhappy about something that normally makes me happy – dancing – I started trying to figure out why.
My dance teacher has the well-intended and sometimes ambitious goal of making us independent dancers. She wishes us to not only be able to improve our technique and learn a few steps in a sequence but to be able to dance freely and maybe even make up our own choreography. Lately that has meant that we’ve been asked to improvise to whichever song she’d decided to play. I’m rubbish at improvising – always have been. But why bring this up in a blog about being introvert?
Well, I can’t even count the many times I’ve been put on the spot: music has been turned on and I’m asked to improvise, I have been sat infront of an video editing board and told to play, or at work, I’m supposed to rely on youtube videos to learn the skills I don’t have. But for an introvert this senario is one of the most frustrating situations that exists.
Introverts, and I am again refering to the book Quiet (reviewed in an earlier post), tend to focus on meaning, we work slowly and deliberately and we tend to practice our skills methodically in solitude. We prepare, digest new information and aim for accuracy. We observe, we think before we act. Improvising to a piece of music goes against my nature no matter how much I’m willing to give it a go. There is no sense of playfulness in this as it requires an enormous effort and concentration trying to get my brain to follow in the quick pace that’s required. You don’t think when you improvise, I hear you extroverts say. True, which is why it’s so difficult for an introvert because your mind will still try.
When do I play? I play once I have had a chance to observe and internalize, and afterwards I can spend time practising, practising and practising again – then I can play with it, knowing that it’s in my backbone.
If you’re a teacher and you have this one student who sometimes seems to just stand there, don’t write them off as not trying. There are several reasons the student doesn’t seem to participate – one is that they are introverts and need a chance to observe and internalize before they jump in.