I have never perceived myself as shy although I think it’s fair to say that a lot of introverts are. I would think most of us are not comfortable to be in the spotlight. We don’t want to be the centre of attention and speaking, even in a group of friends, can be perceived as more attention than what we really want.
The online Oxford Dictionaries defines shy as being nervous or timid in the company of others, slow or reluctant to do something or also having a dislike of or aversion to a specific thing. Well, I guess that I am shy then. I have a dislike of being the centre of attention, which can make me nervous in the company of large groups or reluctant to do things that will draw attention to me. That is not to say though that I will NOT attend functions that include large groups, or that I will NOT speak my mind in such as group, or that I will NOT draw attention to myself if so is necessary which I think a genuinely shy person would. For instance, all my life I have enjoyed performing…as long as it’s in a group, a choir or a dance troop where I share the attention from the audience. Reading my own texts on a stage is not something I enjoy even if I do it more and more frequently.
I have for a long time harboured the dream of becoming a writer. Story-telling is something that has fascinated me all my life. The modern author’s apparent necessity to be famous, a literary pop-star, to be able to be successful has intimidated me to go after this dream. Again, I think this is more my introvert side saying, “we don’t really want that much attentions do we,” rather than shyness. I have overcome this in two ways: one is a firm belief that I can be successful on my own terms; two that the readers I seek are like me – more interested in the stories than who wrote them – and if finding a readership comes with the baggage of more attention to my person than I like, well, I’ll learn to live with it.
Are introverts shy? I say not necessarily. Some are but others just have a preference for the slow, for the small and for the quiet and would never seek attention for its own sake.